She has been called a "loose cannon". And I knew this was an accurate assessment of her personality, but my attraction had no fear because I knew that at the very least I was sure to experience a great learning. And I have. I sense that her withdrawal from me is more about her own desire for hermitage rather than resentment around my defending someone against her onslaught. Unfortunately I don't think that there is any abundance of time in our favor.
I also knew this was coming. And despite becoming cannon fodder I have no regrets. Like I said, it has been a great learning experience. Just because part of the learning involved sorrow does not make it any the less valuable. And I have an added dimension of love in my heart for which I am so grateful. Normally I have a serious rejection complex that keeps me perpetually locked in pause mode when it comes to meeting people.
She said she always falls for people with a lot of rage, who eventually abandon her. She wants to disappear. She wants to live out her life in hermitage, writing her poetry, and wishing she were young again – her words.
